Isabel's Jugs

About a year and a half ago, John Waters put together a movie festival in Palm Springs provocatively titled "Films That Will Corrupt You." Being easily provoked and desiring to meet Mr. Waters as well as catch Fuego, an Argentine film (1969) about a nymphomaniac torn between her husband and lesbian lover starring the frectual Isabel Sarli, I managed to toss two victims kickin' and screamin' into my car (OK, so I made one of the victims drive) for what was arguably the worst traffic crawl in southern California: the west LA to Palm Springs drag--on a Friday night no less. Did I have some major cojones or what?

As fate would have it, we missed the nuancely moustached director himself (sob) arriving like a bazillion hours behind schedule. But before you feel too sorry for us, we still managed to catch every mama-maulin' second of Fuego so the evening was far from being a bust.

Isabel Sarli (sobriqueted "La Coca" for her addiction to the soft drink) was this supposed screen legend in Argentina in the 60s and 70s. I say "supposed" because not everyone I've asked here has heard of her (I shudder to think that 30 years from now, not everyone in America will know who Pamela Anderson is), though one friend did enlighten me with this quintessential quote de Sarli: "Que es lo que quiere de mi?" (You have to say it with your girls all smooshed up in a va-va-voom way.) Edit: I've just been informed by another that the septuagenarian Sarli is rumored to live in the Zona Norte! Holy bazookas, that makes us neighbors! Gotta spit-n-shine my stalker kit.

In short, Fuego had everything: hilariously bad, exaggerated acting and campy dialogue, production quality just two notches below your average YouTube, a John Waters endorsement, plus tons of self-massaging of ginormous funbags by said screen siren. It was unmitigated, cheesetastic fun with just a touch of drivel thrown in for, well...extra fun! If I hadn't been already corrupted, that might've done the trick.

Anyway, all this word vomit is really to show off my awesomely awesome score(!) from San Telmo this past weekend. Ladies and gentlemen, please admire and covet my Fuego poster (sadly, just the one on top). What?! You now have that Divinyls song "Touch Myself" running through your noggin too?!? And you picture Divine dancing to it too?!? GMTA!