Stuff, Weird Ones

My folks are here, though I think there must have been one madcap message mix-up. Somewhere in Argentina someone's parents got the invite to come and chill-lax, while mine came with 4 luggage full of...strange ingredients for cooking up batches of Oriental dishes (at least they spared me the tiny sugar crabs this time). See exhibit...

1: Vacuum-packed crunchy egg noodles, for some kind of bird's nest concoction. Also, cases of rice paper wraps.

2: Um. Pack after pack of cooked salted duck eggs WITH GOLD YOLK (the label screams).

3. Nothing strange about this one, though I did recently notice it in Barrio Chino, costing a bazillion pesos apiece. Damn if it ain't worth the import jackup.

4. My sister Sarah sent this mug and it fucking rocks my world. Lee's Sandwiches, if you aren't lucky enough to know, is only the coolest bahn mi (Vietnamese sandwich) franchise ever! Sipping their cafe su da is like injecting condense-milky espresso straight into your veins.

5. I can't believe the nerve of my parents--thinking a gourmand like myself would suck face with such sugar drivel, such Britney-worthy comestibles, such...oh who am I kidding? I begged for these. I heart les trashique faux cupcakes, I do, I do.