Bible 2.0

I had no idea the bible was this, um, cool! According to the Telegraph UK, the Evangelical Alliance has come up with 10 Commandments for Christian bloggers. Dude, why the non-mention of porn? My personal 10 would be all about porn (thou shall not blog about donkey sex, for example).

Here are the official ten commandments for bloggers, as handed down by religious geeks [and let's see how our hero does]:

1. You shall not put your blog before your integrity. [Strike 1. Damn.]
2. You shall not make an idol of your blog. [Come again?]
3. You shall not misuse your screen name by using your anonymity to sin. [Is having a short--nay, shortest--fuse sinful? Strike. Good thing I only have to count up to ten.]
4. Remember the Sabbath day by taking one day off a week from your blog. [Cool, since I'm usually too tired from Friday night's debauchery to lift a posting finger the next.]
5. Honour your fellow bloggers above yourselves and do not give undue significance to their mistakes. [Damn, no more bitching out other blogger's' love of stray apostrophe's? Harsh.]
6. You shall not murder someone else's honour, reputation or feelings. [Whoa, way to take the fun out of snarking!]
7. You shall not use the web to commit or permit adultery in your mind. [I guess this is as close to porn as I'll get. But wait--let's parse words. Is it a sin only in mind, but OK in body? Curiouser and curiouser...]
8. You shall not steal another person's content. [So much moral guidance, so little time...]
9. You shall not give false testimony against your fellow blogger. [Insert random comment.]
10. You shall not covet your neighbour's blog ranking. Be content with your own content. [bwah....OK, I'm gasping for air here. So The Onion....]

Yabbut...

...without the divine intervention of TV, I'd have to hear my own thoughts.

Your Nine Months Are Up!

I can't think of a worse line to entice shopping mothers than "carrying you forever..." srly, wtf? It's a good thing the Prune line is so darn awesome.